hank You for the sunrise this morning, Abba. It means that life is continuing. It means that I have another chance to make You smile today. As long as I have breath in me, I am not defeated. You have not abandoned me to the grave, thus I will not abandon others to the grave. Compassion and forgiveness, You have poured out upon me—therefore, I will spill it out upon others. Let me not harbor what You have freely given to me. If I hold Your sweetness inside, how will others taste and see that You are good?
Oh, forgive me Abba. I have put You in a cage to make You perform—to dance to the tune of my manipulative music. I have struck at You with the whip of my words saying, “dance; move; do something!” Oh, how I’ve judged You because You have not done my desire. You have not conformed to my will nor my image. I have brought You lower than my prideful head held high. Yet, now I realize that it is I who have allowed myself to be caged.
Forgive me if I have ascribed to You wrong-doing. Forgive me for blaming You for the mess I have created for myself. If I really knew You were for me, I would not be against me. If I have failed You, it is because I did not know You. To know You is life eternal. Life eternal is knowing You! Forgive me for not allowing You to be who You already said You were. You are the I AM, and I am not the I AM.
You have loved me with an everlasting love—why do I show others such limited love? Why can I not give back to You in the same proportion to what I have received from You? It’s fear Father. I fear as Ananias and Sapphira did. I fear giving up, because it is too easy to keep back a portion of my life in case of a “rainy day.” Forgive me for ‘saving’ my life, as somehow in doing so, I feel I have lost it.
I am so sorry Abba, for I have held onto something that belongs to You—my will. If only I knew to give up my desire for Your desire, my desires I would have. I have allowed the enemy to misinterpret Your goodness towards me, as a ploy to get me to abandon my need for You. Forgive me. I will only listen to Your Words through the funnel of Your Word, and I will not allow the enemy to usurp what You have told me is truth.
For I am more than an overcomer, because You chose to love me first. And I will stay an overcomer because I will not lose my First Love again! I am above, and not beneath. I am the head, and not the tail. I am blessed. My basket is full, and I am fruitful in all that I do. Why am I all of these things? Because I have chosen Your Word and have diligently obeyed it. You have set me on high, because I have known Your Name. All that I have, You have given to me. I have received because You first loved me, thus I give back to You the fruit of my life.
I once sought my own way, yet You weighed my heart. I was found wanting, and nothing I could do to add to my worth could ever balance my life. Oh, thank You, Bright and Morning Star, for coming to balance my life. For my unrighteousness could never achieve equality with Your righteousness. You showed me if only I would humble my arrogant heart, and repent for the excesses in my life, that You would come and bear my burdensome load.
You made a way into my life, because through my brokenness, I cleared the way for Your life. You never gave up on me, so how can I give up on You? Make me see clearly that the real enemy I face is not the ‘countenance’ of the One who loved me before I knew my own name. Oh, the lies of men, the religious interpretations of Your Words, the abusive words of my loved ones—these things are not an excuse to shake my fist in Your face, and say, “You did these things to me!” Reveal the hidden so that I know who my real enemy is.
Throw open the flap of the door of my tent, and allow the Son to beam through on the inside. Then, I will see clearly in order to clean up the filth of my dwelling. For I know You are returning soon. Forgive me for placing a price tag on Your mercy. For the value I placed on my life, was the value the enemy said I was worth. And for what I thought I was worth, is the same value I placed on You.
Oh, Abba, I am not a mistake. For You see, the enemy cannot lightly esteem You directly. The enemy cannot belittle You into believing something You are not. He cannot touch the Uncreated. He knows Your untouchable, so he goes after the treasure of Your heart–Your children. No, He cannot harm You directly, but attempts to use Your beloved to try and curse You for things You never did. The enemy has used my life as a tool to spew hate against You. As long as I saw You as the One who was the cause of all my pain and all my hurt–I was miserable, You were grieved, and the enemy rejoiced. Because all the enemy ever wants is to put me against You. If I can believe that, I have wrongfully accused You based on the witness of one—the enemy.
For I know that for a word to be true, there must be at least two witnesses. I therefore, choose today, to no longer listen to or accept the witness of one—that old serpent the devil–but choose to listen to and accept The Witness within me—Your Spirit. For Your Spirit witnesses to the Word, Your Son, and Your Word have I placed within my heart that I might not sin against You. I will believe what You tell me is truth, because now I have the witness of Two. Every word spoken against me by the enemy will not stand, because I have Two Witnesses to defend me against my accuser.
All that You have spoken concerning me, I will listen to–I will believe. The enemy says I am a failure, because my Father failed me. How can I be anything other than what You have said I was? Therefore, I will shut the mouths of those who speak against me, and every tongue that rises against me will not prosper. This is my heritage. This is my right as a servant of the Most High! I will not allow accusations of the enemy to ride any longer. You have told me to go forward, and I will go forward.
Those that do not receive the simplicity of Your truth, I shake the dust off and move on to the ones who will receive it. I believe what You say, because You have proven Yourself over and over and over again. If You never lifted another finger to help me, You have already outdone Yourself. I submit to Your will today, for my own desires are selfish, and do nothing but provide mating calls to every demonic spirit out there.
I separate my life unto You, because You have separated Yourself unto me, through Your Son. All that I am, I owe to You. I was drowning in the sea of my own pollution, yet You never let me drown. I heard You calling my name when I lay in death’s tomb. I came forth, not by my own strength, but because I heard the sound of Your Words, driven by the breath of Your Spirit–that same Spirit that gave me life when I was first formed from the dust of the earth. I was nothing, lifeless because Your breath was not in me, but now I am everything, alive because You exhaled into me. Your blood flows through me, and I am no longer a citizen to that kingdom of slavery. I am a child of the Light. I am a citizen of the Kingdom of Light. You are my new Master! You broke my chains. You raised me up. You set my feet upon a rock, and now I dance to the tune of Your grace and mercy.
I no longer repeat who I used to be, because I have become a new me. No longer over me is there a death decree, for it has been destroyed by the power of the stake for me. Your Son’s death has made me alive, so that I can die, so that Your Son can live through me. I have life because You raised up Your Son from the grave. My life is hidden in Him, and I will be raised to life, because I have made You my life. I will not be deceived any longer. I know who my real enemy is now, and You are not him! I can believe You because You are so believable! You are more real than what I can see with my eyes, and no lies will ever blind me again!
As the sun rose this morning, breaking in on my darkness, so the Son will rise again and break through ALL darkness—forever and ever!
Forever and ever, You shall reign!
Come, my Beloved, Come!
HalleluYah! HalleluYah! HalleluYah!